Thursday, April 16, 2009

Memo to Napolitano: Tea Party Report

Taking heed of Janet Napolitano’s 4-7-09 memo to US Law Enforcement offices, I accepted an undercover mission to root out man-made-disaster experts in their dens of antipathy. The mission required that I carefully craft a disguise, as not to be outed a spy. I wore red/white/blue, waved an American flag & took my mother (mild-mannered Grandmother of 8, Bible study leader, Garden Club member) & her neighbor (also Grandmother & wife to retired Naval Officer) with me. These women exuded threat & diverted any suspicions of my spy-status. While they frothed at the gills with rage in their eyes, I remained calm & steady. It was vigorous work, & I even had to carry protest signs: “TEA: Taxed Enough Already” & “Stop the Looting” in order not to be suspected an infiltrator.

Their group was almost 2,000 strong in the small city of Winston-Salem, NC (the closest den of hate we could find) & I was swimming in a sea of propaganda. By the time the speakers finished spouting their Right Wing Terrorist propaganda of Life, Liberty, & the pursuit of happiness, the value & meaning of the US Constitution, radical ideas of People keeping wages in their own wallets, & forcing the Government to be accountable for spending of the People’s money, I was thoroughly disgusted. Toughing it out, I channeled my inner ‘Susan Sarandon’ & acted the part: chanting “USA, USA, USA…” & cheering wildly for Government accountability/responsiblity. Let me tell you, it was grueling work, but I got the goods. I have the evidence:


These people were menacing, threatening & dangerous. They must be reigned in – before they take over the country!


~~~

14 comments:

Joe said...

You not only infiltrated...you got PICTURES. How good are you?

USA_Admiral said...

They hid their guns and bombs well too.

Susannah said...

Joe-I'm good. Trained by the best. They never even suspected...

USA - the AK-47's were tough to spot, but I saw a few under coveralls & aprons...even thought I saw one peeking out of a stroller, but I couldnt get close enough to see.

Anonymous said...

Ha, I like the "which one are you drinking" poster. Thanks for the pictures.

Anonymous said...

Loved yesterday!! LOVED it! Now, the question is: what are we going to DO with the momentum?!? We've got to keep the energy and focus of yesterday going forward.

On the other hand, the whole day would have been worth it anyway just to see CNN's Susan Roesgen have a breakdown....:)

Anonymous said...

A great report, Susannah ... had me chuckling. I hope you didn't water-board anyone, and I hope you didn't talk to any veterans ... it might blow your cover!

Thank you for your discussion today at Social Sense. You were spot on in your analysis! As long as you realize that talking to Ducky is much like talking to a 3-year old.

Melonie said...

This post is, on the one side, absolutely HILARIOUS. I, too, love that "which one are you drinking?" sign. It'd make a wonderful bumper sticker.

But the problem I see is that there is some liberal twit *oops, did I say that out loud?* that is going to take this seriously and then pull something out of context. Kinda like Gov. Perry's secession comments - which in *NO* way advocated it.... and yet, what is the media focusing on? What are the Dems using as fodder?

How depressing. Can I change the channel? lol

I do have to reiterate tho - even with my fear that some moron is going to misuse this... this is SO AWESOME.

Melonie said...

PS (Sorry, hit publish too soon.) Your USA chant comment reminded me of something REALLY REALLY awesome that I heard yesterday. Several fighter jets flew over our house and suddenly, from the playground, I heard a handful of children shouting, "USA! USA! USA!" Mind you, all the kiddos here are military "brats" but they have never done that before here.

I channeled my Inner Tough Mommy and didn't cry.... but man, soooo close. ;-)

BetteJo said...

Love the post, especially the Grandmas! What great cover! And I saw the tea/kool-aid sign on TV last night - LOVED IT!

And thank you for going. Undercover of course. :)

Susannah said...

Kris~ Thanks for coming by! I liked that one, too. The cute young woman who was holding it was proud to have the picture taken.

PJ~ Wasn't it terrific?! @ our rally, there was some good discussion about 'what to do next'. I was glad to hear it, b/c like you, I was wondering the same thing...I'm hoping we can harnes the energy.

Mustang~ So glad you got a kick out of this! It was fun to write. :) It was a privilege to visit your blog & engage the discussion.

Mel~ Glad you got a kick out of this, too! (I love your comments!) I'm not worried about someone taking this out of context. People can read their own agenda into about anything. All one would have to do is see the entirety of this blog to know how sarcastic I was being, all in the name of pokin a little fun! On the other hand, it must have made you real proud to hear those little kiddies chanting USA! You're a tougher Mama than me! ;)

BetteJo~ If you can believe it, the Grandmas yelled louder than I did!! What fun!!

Anonymous said...

And not even one bomb was exploded! How about that Ms Napolitano..

Jim said...

Were the folks at this tea party extreme right wingers? They don't appear to be. If they aren't, then they aren't the subject or concern of the DHS report.

Susannah said...

RisR!~ Glad to see you again! You know, I kept hearing a ticking somewhere...must have been my watch! (Kidding, of course...)

Jim~ Most of them weren't I suppose, but how do you tell? They're so good at blending in, what with all that flag waving & 2nd Amendment stuff. Oh, & "they arent' the subject or concern of the DHS report" - sorry, friend, the timing of the report & the implications of it were patently obvious. Also the treat of Govt. intervention/retaliation was veiled, but crystal clear. (We keep getting bogged down by nuance, don't we, you & I?)

Susannah said...

oops! I said 'treat', but of course I meant 'threat'...

(hmmm...maybe that's what they're trying to do...make us believe it's a treat?? Unconscious Freudian slip??)